Thanks to my "old" friend Eileen for this one...

AAADD
KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....PLEASE READ!

Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
Somehow I feel better even though I have it!!
Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.
As I start toward the garage,
I notice mail on the porch table that
I brought up from the mail box earlier.
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys on the table,
put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,
and notice that the can is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back
on the table and take out the garbage first.
But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.
I take my check book off the table,
and see that there is only one check left.
My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking.
I'm going to look for my checks,
but first I need to push the Pepsi aside
so that I don't accidentally knock it over.
The Pepsi is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator or to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter
catches my eye--they need water.
I put the Pepsi on the counter and
discover my reading glasses that
I've been searching for all morning.
I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
Someone left it on the kitchen table.
I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote,
but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.
I pour some water in the flowers,
but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.
So, I set the remote back on the table,
get some towels and wipe up the spill.
Then, I head down the hall trying to
remember what I was planning to do.
At the end of the day:
the car isn't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only 1 check in my check book,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, and I'm really tired.
I realize this is a serious problem,
and I'll try to get some help for it,
but first I'll check my e-mail....

Do me a favor.
Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember who I've sent it to.

Three Wise Men

Thomas Jefferson's Decalogue, February 25, 1825

1.  Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today.

2.  Never trouble another for what you can do yourself.

3.  Never spend your money before you have it.

4.  Never buy what you do not want because it is cheap; it will be dear to you.

5.  Pride costs us more than hunger, thirst, and cold.

6.  We never repent of eating too little.

7.  Nothing is troublesome that we do willingly.

8.  How much pain have cost us the evils which have never happened.

9.  Take things always by their smooth handle.

10. When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, an hundred.

Benjamin Franklin's Plan for Moral Perfection (slightly revised)

1.  Temperance: Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation

2.  Silence: Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself

3.  Order: Let all things have their places

4.  Resolution: Resolve to perform what you ought, perform without fail what you resolve

5.  Frugality: Waste nothing

6.  Industry: Lose no time

7.  Sincerity: Use no hurtful deceit

8.  Justice: Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty

9.  Moderation: Avoid extremes

10. Cleanliness: Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, clothes, or habitation

George Washington's Rules of Civility (short version)

1.  Speak not when others speak

2.  Every action in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those present

3.  Use no reproachful language against anyone

4.  Be not hasty to believe flying reports to the disparagement of anyone

5.  Play not the peacock

6.  Be not forward, but friendly and courteous

7.  Think before you speak

8.  Be not apt to relate news if you know not the truth thereof.

9.  Speak no evil of the absent, for it is unjust.

10. Labor to keep alive in your breast that little spark of celestial fire called conscience.

A Bit of Presidential Advice

John Quincy Adams wrote this list and sent it to his father, John Adams:

March 16, 1780 My Work for a Day,

Latin

Explain Cicero, Erasmus, Appendix

Learn greek Racines

Learn Greek Grammar

Geography

Geometry

fractions

Writing

Drawing

His father, the future president, criticized the youngster for his poor penmanship!  John Quincy was 12 at the time he wrote this list!!!  I guess it paid off because John Quincy was our 6th president.

Thomas Jefferson wrote this to his daughter Patsyon November 28, 1783.  

"With respect to the distribution of your time, the following is what I shall approve:

8 to 10, practice music

10 to 1. dance one day and draw another

1 to 2, draw on the day you dance, and write a letter next day

3 to 4, raed French

4 to 5, exercise yourself in music

5 till bed-time, read English, write, etc.

Her father, the future president, wrote this to Patsy when she was 10.

Don't think you are being hard on your kids if you shut the TV off and have them study.  It's good for them and good for your country.

The End Of Civilization

The end of civilization as we know it.  Proof:

1) The Dow dropped under 10,000 despite the $700 billion "bailout."

2) The top grossing film in North America this weekend was "Beverly Hills Chihuahua."

Next: The Dodgers

Go Phillies!!!

I Need An Attorney!!!

No matter who wins this election, the American people are in for it.  Neither candidate can truly claim that taxes will be reduced.  How can the Treasury borrow $700 billion from American taxpayers without a subsequent raise in taxes?  

Under what law, what power, what authority can Congress take this money and hand it to the very people who have screwed this up to begin with?  

I would like to hear from a tax attorney who is willing to file a class action suit against each and every member of Congress who voted for this, pro bono of course.  Every American should be outraged that the treasury is being emptied by those currently in power.  

The Founding Fathers rightly worried that taxes would lead to corruption in government.  

Hank Paulson is head of the US TReasury Department.  His actions have consistently favored the rich and blamed the current economic woes on social security, medical programs, and mortgage loans to those who could not afford them.  Fingers pointed directly at the middle class.  Yet Paulson, and Congress, were live wolves on a sheep to eliminate the estate tax on all but the richest Americans.  

How about reducing tax shelters, tax loopholes, off shore accounts, and strengthen Sarbanes-Oxley?  Nope, instead he and the administration push through $700 billion to buy bad debt from all of Paulson's buddies.  He has claimed that the banks will probably over inflate the value of their holdings, then sell them at over inflated prices.  Won't this bring us right back to where we started?  Then he and the administration will come calling again for more dollars. Only this time it will be the Democrats who get blamed.  And around and around we go, where it stops nobody knows!

Happy Sunday!

The Reverse

I am curious:  What was in the new version of the "bailout" that caused members of the House of Representatives to change their vote practically overnight?  I think American taxpayers are owed an explanation by their representatives, especially those who voted NO then retreated and voted YES.  I am sure they will claim that they did not understand the implication of voting NO.  That's not good enough.  And when the next bailout rolls around they will claim they voted NO, leaving out the fact that they reversed their position and later voted YES.  That's not good enough.  I would also very much like to know what the limitation is on the salary of any CEO of any company seeking funds from the Treasury bailout.  I have yet to see this information.  Anyone?